I, the Unintentional Bully

 Recently, I found something lodged in between the pages of a book that really took me back. It was a handwritten letter from a friend, requesting me to hear out his apology, and asking me to wear appropriately before meeting him at the tuition centre. Seeing the three-year-old letter really brought me down memory lane, despite wanting to steer away from this part of my life. I need to store it in the deepest part of my mind, only opening the memories once more when I want to paint myself as an awkward kid/preteen bully in the eyes of my kids, and their kids, which would be unlikely.

It was suffice just to come to me and talk face-to-face, rather than waste a half paper to write a really short and somewhat incomprehensible memo. But I have to admit, it was pretty nice of him to go this far. :)

 “WHAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAT???” I hear questioning screams from the other side of the screen.

 Yes, I have to admit. I was a bully. More like ‘accused as a bully’, but never mind. It might be shocking for those who know me.  Frankly, I was quite as surprised as you are, when my friends started to label me that a few years back. They don’t call me that for no reason, that, I realise now.

 There’s a long story behind the then-absurd claims. There was this one peer of mine, who was rather slow compared to other kids, the same one who wrote to me the aforementioned letter. To make the story less confusing, I shall name him W. Hence, being the simpleminded teen I was, I played around with the guy. I remembered clearly how a friend and I (Yeah, it wasn’t only me.), came up with a ruse.  W always carried his water bottle with him, so whenever he left it on the rack to enter the library, we would always relocate it to another spot on the rack, usually hidden from sight.  When he freaked out and reported to the teacher, we would put on our innocent masks and offered to help. And that was only a small segment in a long list of misdeeds done to him.

 You could see how cautious and scared he was of me; he’d run away from me when we coincidentally met on the way to the loo during exam week, and his homeroom teacher, to whom he put his trust on, gave me a suspicious glare whenever I pass by. Heck, there was even that one time when I watched TV with him (It’s a rare occasion.) Some mischievous guy spooked him from behind, and guess which name he screamed out in anger?

 The biggest blow occurred on a day which started off quite normally. The library was a common interest between W and I; I found peace and solitude within a room surrounded by a rowdy atmosphere, while he expressed curiosity towards the TV that sat at the corner of the library. On that day, he pestered a few people, cornering them into a room, holding the door to keep him from opening it. And I, annoyed by the disruption of peace, plus the sudden ‘hero complex’ idea that sparked in my foolish mind, proceeded to kick him out. Struggled to, to be precise. W was constantly screaming and shouting at me throughout the whole ordeal, which turned every pair of eyes at the both of us. Ever since then, people have been calling me a bully from time to time.

 This particular accident compelled him to write the above letter, describing how sorry he was for ‘bullying’ me in front of the others. The nerve.  Anyway, you could imagine by now how terrible I was towards W. Even I feel ashamed at the amount of grief he endured from me.

 In my defense,  I was merely teasing him. But I suppose that was how other bullies would say. I have somewhat learnt from that period of time; cover up my tracks if I were to ever commit a crime again. That, and to think about how others feel before I act.

 Oh, if you're wondering what the letter up there says, and you just couldn't squint enough to have a read, don't fret. Here is the content of the letter. :D :

Dear Asroff,

 I knew I'm sorry that I'd bullied you for a while in the library. As you know what bullying is the pengawas (prefect) will write my name to the list.

 I'm sure that I'm in a bad mood for a bit. While you're at the dewan tertutup (closed hall) I think you will get revenge to me. Please don't call somebody about me.

 Go to the tuition center by today. Wear formal clothing when you have Malay and Science class. Be there when I came to the tuition by car. I need to apologise to you.

 Please accept my apologies. Thank you.

Two things to know:
1) He spelled my name wrong; and
2) If you think that there are a few grammatical errors there, it's not my fault. I typed it word by word.